If you have children and access to the internet, you have no doubt witnessed them "intant messaging" with their friends. Perhaps you have even used these services yourself. As responsible parents you no doubt supervise the young'uns to see that no harm befalls them. Your chief fear is probably that a pervert or terrorist group will take advantage of the naiveté of youth. But what you probably failed to notice is that there is a much darker and viler influence working on the minds of our children from within the instant messenger application itself.

I'm talking about subliminal messages. Subliminal messages are subtle suggestions planted in the media that are designed to be below our normal threshold of consciousness, but perceivable to us on a subconscious level. These suggestions are seized upon by our subconscious and can have very real effects on our behavior. For example, subliminal messages have been known to make otherwise normal people do such irrational things as eating babies, killing kittens, and purchasing subscriptions to the magazine Vibe. Being what we are, the Triad is able to pierce through such illusions and machinations and get to the ultimate truth of the matter, where others would no doubt fall prey to such things.

Now, you're no doubt wondering how I can make such a bold statement. Well ladies and gentlemen, it just so happens that I have proof, in the form of an unaltered screenshot taken from a conversation on a popular instant messenger application. I will exhibit such, here. It takes little imagination to pick up on the vile and evil suggestion being portrayed here, just below the level of normal consciousness. The imagination of... a child?

*UPDATE* Through further research, it has come to the attention of the Triad that the level of visciousness and depravity on the part of the instant messaging services is much greater than was formerly known, evidenced thusly:


It took some sick monkeys to come up with this shit.

Now, you're probably wondering, as did I, just what is that thing to the right of the open, wanting lips? The truth is I have no idea. There's only one thing I can think of that it resembles.

In light of this startling revelation you will no doubt forbid your children from ever using these indoctrinational tools of the corporations and big government again, as any responsible parent would. But that's not enough I'm afraid. Subliminal suggestions are everywhere. After reading this piece you will probably find them in many things you previously thought were wholesome. You can't trust anyone or anything. Your neighbor could be writing an email or a webpage with sublinal suggestions in it as you read this. I'm afraid the only place you are truly safe is here.

Praise the Triad!